Hi
I was not serious with my life and it was going great and now when i am serious with my life, my mouth is filled with mud and i cannot think of anything but to survive and hide my shameful face from the people who trusted me more than anything, i kept of taking favor form other thinking i would pay them back with  double as  interest but here i am down to earth praying the mighty Lord to forgive me for all my sins that i committed due to my innocence and ignorance (both of them are relatives of sin). Now when i try to get myself together for one more time, i see my self scattered into small repelling pieces of ego, emotion, loyalty, friendship love and million other pieces which no one can think of. My parents asked me to live a stable life as i am the eldest son in the family and i had to take care of my younger brother and sister not only financially but morally i wanted to be an ideal before them. Now when i look back i cannot see anything other than failure and shame which brought to myself and my colleagues.  I started to  streets and now back on streets hunting for the ray of leading light which is hard to see. I kept on experimenting my life every now and then and never thought what the results would be and now the results are not too horrifying as i have passed a phase which  normally people experience after 15-20 years of experience, i was never a successful guy but at least i tasked success several time which is a beautiful experience for me. I can speak endless words for my current situation but i don;t think this is how i always wanted to live my life. I always wanted to experience something different and i did and i am not at all sad for me but when i look back to the pieces of house all lying as dust particles on ground to which i contributed i feel sad for others to also contributed to making this house a dreamland. The only thing i demanded from life is nothing then why i got something. I believe experience is something related to the memories received from your failures so that you learn and not from your victories from which you donot learn anything new. My friends just a small request from my side, believe in yourself and think of other related to you as you were born alone and die alone but have to stay with someone during your survival so cannot ignore anyone. Now i will stop spending my reckless ink and tiny brain and there is much to be decided as this is not the end this is the beginning for me. Now i will be what I always wanted to be.
So Cheers………………………………for one more time ……………………………………..hold your breadth for one more Mile..